I have four people in my life that I call cousins even though they aren’t cause it was just easier to describe my relationship with them. Their mother, though not related to me, set up my parents and helped raised me thus I call her aunty. I was thinking about it today cause I referred to them as my cousins in front my dad and he was like whaat.
passive aggressive family members
"guess i’ll never be a grandma"
"guess i’ll never be an aunt"
"guess i’ll never be able to dress a niece/nephew"
stop feeling so entitled to my hypothetical offspring. it is not yours. it is mine. i will grow it if i grow it. and it will be mine. not yours. i am not an incubator which grants you familial titles. jesus. go away. this “have a baby i can play with” thing is so impersonal and insensitive and annoying.
long-distance friendships are terrible because you can’t meet up with them whenever you want and hang out on any given day which is why when i’m president i’m relocating the entire human population into a 10,000,000 story skyscraper that also acts as a bridge from earth to the moon which comes with the added benefit of swinging the moon around like a fucking mace, god damn it’s gonna look so cool. what was i talking about